Not Good at Good-Byes

I can't bring myself to officially shut 'er down - yet - but can y'all please start visiting me over at my other and now main blog, Deadlines and Naptimes?

For three reasons:

1) Isn't that an AWESOME mommy blog name? Yeah, I know, I'm not creative by nature so when I hit something good I am proud.

2) I HATE the name of this blog, always have and there's no clean way I can think to tinker without basically starting over. No, wait, yes ... there's no way (subtext: at least not an easy way for a only very part-time web geek like me).

3) I cannot maintain two blogs and long ago the reason for STARTING a second one - documenting Rachel's birth - luckily wrapped up (i.e., she popped out). So now I'll just have one life, two kids and the ONE BLOG. Some of which is evidenced by my last photo post to Eemia's life...my kids at my mom's for Thanksgiving. Yes that's right, not Christmas, peeps, those are still on the camera. HENCE why I'm STREAMLINING a bit.

This blog will remain in cyber-wherever for a while I guess, I hope, so maybe someday when I've got spare time (whoo HOOOO can you believe I said that?) I can print off the posts.

Or as EEJ and I have fervently been discussing, maybe I can transfer them over to populate my other blog someday when Blogger gets a clue and makes that possible (COME ON, BLOGGER EMPLOYEE #18 WHO IS IN CHARGE OF SECRETLY MONITORING OUR BLOGS FOR 'USER INPUT' - MAKE IT HAPPEN!)

Anyway it's sad to say good-bye. This was my first foray into blogging and it's been cathartic, fun, and most important, given me great connections and insights into this new world of moms and blogs. I know so many people better now - IRL and online, I've learned so much from everyone here, and look forward to continue and hopefully even step it up, over there.

I've been postponing this post because I thought I'd do something more fantastical to say Bye but instead I'll say CLICK HERE NOW and be on my merry way. Sniffffffff.

One of My Faves

There are SO many mommy bloggers out there, but somehow Alexa of Flotsam has captured me lately and more than most.

First, she is hilar. WISH I could write like this. Second, she is honest. But third, it's not just that she's honest, it's that she just nails it.

Warning, this one's kind of sad, part of a string of posts that are VERY sad, reflecting on the loss of her second twin before birth. But it's also captures WHY mommy blogs matter and WHY we should all feel free to post what the hell we damn please so say:

I think sometimes we try too hard to fit our lives into the shapes of the
stories we know. I doubt we’ll ever really stop doing that, so I believe the
best we can do is to make sure there are as many stories out there as
possible. The women who have written honestly about motherhood—the
good and the bad—helped me through moments of my pregnancy when I wonderd if I’d be too anxious and overwhelmed to be a good mother. Whatever I felt, I knew that it would be ok, that others had felt it too, and had sent their reassuring lighthouse beams out into the murky waters for me. After I brought Simone home, I almost felt guilty posting about how much I adored motherhood (this is VERY ADVANCED GUILT—don’t try it at home), because I didn’t want someone who enjoyed it less to feel bad. Obviously, I was missing the point. In elementary school we had a program called U R UNIQUE, a sort of cork-board precursor to a blog. Each week a new classmate would festoon the appointed corner of the room with artifacts of herself: pictures, favorite toys, trophies. They would give a presentation of everything Them, and the display would remain up for the rest of us to look at, to see all the little ways we were the same
and different.I like French fries dipped in blue cheese dressing. My house? Is
FILTHY. Having a baby was the best thing that ever happened to my sex life. I’m
a morning person. I wish I didn’t wish I were thinner. I drink my coffee black.
My daughter was a twin. I’m sad about her brother sometimes, but not as much as
you’d think. Right now, I am happier than I have ever been.

I just love that I can sit here on an early morning before anyone's up (can't sleep - late preggo mom stuff - that I'm sure 100 other people are blogging about now). And drink my coffee and read awesome stuff connects me to other women this smart.

THIS is why Dooce was so right on the Today show, and why Kathy Lee needs to learn how to use a &$^%'ing computer.

Time to Make the Donuts

That's how I've felt and that's why I haven't posted. For two weeks or more I've been in to work 1 1/2 early, staying 2 hours late - and sometimes bringing more home for a night shift. It's productive, and appreciated by my team, and lots of great opportunities and responsibilities right now. Just, ya know, a sh--load of work. And no so much on the balance.

I can't believe it's been three weeks since I've posted. In that time we've attended Danny's first birthday party and celebrated our annivesary. And Matthew spent the weekend with Aunt Kim and Uncle Mark. AND we had dinnner with Don, Rosanne and Morgan (my brother's family), which involved trying a new restaurant - one of those cool Japanese places where they cook it right in front of you.

So it's been busy, and I can't even get into it all here. But suffice to say blogging has been lower down on the list past showing up for work, sleeping, feeding Matthew and washing my hair - not always in that order. And sometimes not that hair part.

Erin commented on her blog how hard it is to jump in once you've not posted and there's mountains to talk about. I agree. So I will pull the plug on this post - Hey, I posted! And just add the link to Danny's bday pictures once its available. On that note: At 122 photos long, it's voluminous. But you gotta at least see the two cousins in their PJ's. Our sweet little angel boys.

In the photos are Fernanda, my sis in law and Danny's mom, Scott her husband and Mike's brother, Fernanda's parents Maria Lucia and Fernando - up from Brazil no less - and to that end, a number of Brazilian friends they have in Chicago. I don't think I snapped one of Carole, Fernanda's sister. They are Matthew's third family and such a blessing in our lives since Fe and Scott got married. If it weren't for that whole, on another continent across two oceans thing, we'd love to see them more often.

Grandpa Bob and Grandma Dale, who flew in from Colorado for Danny's day and our visit. Due to travel schedules, we only got to cross paths briefly, so we're really looking forward to big fun over Turkey Day out at their place.

And if you can't wade through the pics - and I really don't blame you - these are more for the two mommies than anyone - here's just ONE capturing the spirit of that cousins weekend: Danny's in love with Matthew, and up for a friendly cousins cuddle (or wrestling match?) anytime. And Matthew is studiously, like, soooo over caring.

Budgetpalooza

All this year, I have been keeping a meticulous detailed budget. We really needed to get on track with our spending. Somehow though I am never buying half of what I want to, we're always, er, tight.

Today was catch-up-my-poor-neglected-budget day. I haven't really maintained it fully in a couple months. During both of Matt's naps and for the last two hours since same went nigh-nigh, I have been entering receipts and reconciling months of spending.

I probably have carpel tunnel and my legs are asleep but it's DONE, it's caught up.

Most of the missing entries were July and August. But for April - June, I also had to compare my list of already entered receipts to our final actual credit card and bank statements. It's anal and time consuming, but if I don't the one I miss will naturally be some little tiny thing ... like our new dryer or Libby's two-week check.

So after all this I see that we are ... well, still tight. We HAVE improved, big time. I can tell and thank goodness and GO US. Our spending in general is down, it's just that we've taken two mini-vacations this summer plus some weekend trips.

But we are, day to day, doing better and it's thanks in part to this budget. Seeing the numbers add up really helps curtail my impulses the next time I'm at Walgreen's or Target. (The key is I have to do it every week or two, though. The impact of my errant Easter-overpurchasing is less impactful now.)

So I finish and I tell Michael proudly we are exceeding our budget for the year but not by TOO much. And that I can see hope for us of places to tighten up a bit more and do better.

And then, to reward myself for my fiscal buttoned-up-ness, I close my horrible budget file and open the Internet to do my daily blog check of my fave mommy blogs.

And I see this post which represents this blogger's ode to (1) unnecessary IKEA purchases and (2) the $400 strollers she's narrowed her stroller search down to. And I think almost want to make my husband read it (though he'd probably sooner run to the store and buy boxes of lady products. He's not quite part of the blogosphere yet).

The point is, this girl PROVES the point I make EVERY time we talk about money.

"If I am overspending at Target ... or have a few too many shoes ... there are a 1,000 women out there doing ten times worse than me at any given moment."

Course, he never buys it.

Neither does my Excel budget sheet.

Well, HELL

My friend Cara's blog introduced me to this neat little tool. It's a rating system for blogs.

What a bunch of CRAP. Apparently Mingle thinks my site is boring as HELL and gave me this G-rating.

Well, they can think what they DAMN well want. My site is plenty R-rated. And they don't know SHI...okay, I can't bring myself to type it knowing moms and mom-in-law read this. I guess all I can aspire to is a PG-13, someday, once I get preggo again and can throw in some more BOOB talk.

The Wonders of Florida and Picasa, Part III

How much do you want to just eat them up? Minus their sand, general grubbiness, and incredible killer stomach virus, of course.

p.s. The wonder of Blogger headers isn't quite as wonderful for me tonight as the Picasa collage feature. EEJ, I need a crash course in not making photo headers look like crap.

I am a Blogging Texan!

Well, it's Day 2 in San Antonio and once again, I don't have any responsibilities tonight. (Thankfully, because Texas air or water or W supporters have made me sick to my stomach all this week...or maybe just a flu bug, since I also covered Orlando Gardens with cranberry vodka for about 10 minutes Saturday night.)

Anyway. I thought I could catch up on #17 on my wandering To Do list ... and get my blog going. Last night, I set-up a template, basic web links and even posted a photo. But I couldn't post a photo to the template itself ... and after more than an hour of tinkering last night past 11 p.m. I gave up.

Try, try again is not usually my M.O. But I know millions of blogs are out there and they're not all built by rocket scientists or web nerds. They're built by nerds of all types ... so why not me? Ha ha ha.

Tonight, I got back on, rearranged my links and after actually taking the radical step of READING the HELP topic on posting photos ... I am now proudly smiling from my home page.

Not quite sure this is necessary but seemed fun. If I'm gonna blog it up, let's take it all the way, right? It's already a weird thing, putting your thoughts out there. You're kinda assuming they're important or clever enough to share. Or that you're too much of an individual to care. But then again, if you don't care, why post? You can type all you want in a Word doc diary and no one ever has to see it.

So, you want someone to see your blog, and so, they might as well see YOU.

In my case, I wanted to show myself with my little boy, who is arguably the center of my world and many of my thoughts and plans right now.

Though 30 pounds from now, when I am super hot, I will boot him right outta there and take a new photo once I don't need such a cute prop.

I HAVE PUBLISHED A PHOTO!

This is me and my number one boy. Our photo, together, which I have just published. Myself. He did NOT even help me.

I am travelling on business. I miss him. I am sustaining myself watching video clips from two months ago ... and blogging about him. Love you, little pal.

I HAVE CREATED A BLOG!

I have been wanting to set-up a ME blog. Not a Babysite for Matthew that I hijack with my wandering thoughts. But an AimMEe blog.

And being just for me, I might KEEP it just for me.

I previewed this plan with my family over dinner Saturday night. I was singing the blog praises. "It's this whole other world...you can connect with random people or those who are basically professional writers who get together to blog about topics like motherhood, music, or collecting mushrooms. Whatever it is, I've learned, there's a blog!"

So I shared that I also wasn't sure I'd make this public. Baby musings are one thing, but my unlimited (or as close as I'll let myself get) are another. That's when Morgan suggested if I DID do this, I could name it Eemia and no one would no.

So I did, and I am...and we'll see who else gets invited into Eemia's life.