Yes, I Hit Her

It's come to my attention that yesterday's post was unclear on a couple fronts.

One, I hit her. Unless she just happeded to be driving a newish looking suburban with a giant grey scrape on the left side of her bumper. Where some other impatient driver shoved past her at another Baptist Convention traffic jam.

Two, there was no one leaving Starbuck's when I did. So as far as their door holding, the world will never know.

Hell Hath No Fury...

Like me driving to work this morning in the midst of the National Baptist Church Convention traffic. Totally unexpected and totally unpleasant

It took me an HOUR to make a 15 - 18 minute commute. Most of that hour was spent between the Memorial Drive 44 exit ... and the 1/4 mile stretch of Memorial Drive that I take before turning onto Pine.

The last two minutes of that hour were spent as follows:

Floor it to sneak in front of the jackass that won't let me over
Get stopped because another jackass is partially blocking my lane on the right
Get incredibly agitated with being 100 feet away from parking garage and yet, not IN garage.
Try to squeeze by jackass #2 on his left.
Screeeeaccchhh.

That last is my car crunching past JA#2's bumper. I stopped and she stopped. We both rolled down windows. We both looked back toward rear ends of our cars. I actually went so far as to yell over to her, "I THINK I JUST DID THAT...?!"

She shot me a dirty look and drove off.

To celebrate slash console myself, I headed down to Starbuck's. Already late, right?

Now, what do you think happened at the Starbuck's on the morning of a giganto convention that is taking over the city? Yes, it was swamped. With people with name tags, looking WAYYY too chipper to be the evil doers I had just done battle with (but they were still not fooling me).

I almost turned right back and left. But come on people, this is my latte we're talking about. I waited for my coffee and watched all the conventioneers politely chatting away, waiting for theirs. Someone dropped a $5 and I gave it back and she was very sweet about it. Plus the Starbuck's people themselves act like your long lost Aunt/Uncle, "Here sweetie, you have a GREAT day now..." Okay I THINK I WILL, THANK YOU!

I finally headed off to work at 9:40 this morning, soothing hot coffee love in hand. And - Erin - tried to guess whether those Baptists would have held the door for me or not ... cuz they sure as h-e-double hockey sticks were NOT letting me over in traffic ten minutes earlier.

Welcome, John!

My friend Tara had her third baby, John Michael Justic, yesterday.

This sweet angel weighed 8 lbs, 9 oz. and was born sometime yesterday afternoon by a planned C-section. (Daddy sent me just a few details and these photos via text messages. Ahh, the times we live in.)

Mommy is doing okay. She's actually feeling kind of sick and well, throwing up. This happened to another friend of mine after her C-section. I hope it doesn't last as long for Tara. I know all she wants to do is enjoy her new son and cuddle her two older kids, Annie and Leo, soon as she can.

We are thrilled for Tara and her husband Todd, and can't wait to meet this sweet beautiful baby boy when we visit sweet home, Chicago, this weekend.

Welcome, John! Your parents have been thinking about you for a long time now. And we ALL love you already.

Of Course, Mini-Vacuums Are Another Story

Despite yesterday's attack on the world of toys, I will now express my joy and adoration for the newest addition to our household, courtesy of Libby.

Matthew's very own vacuum.

He had one he LOVED at his playgroup. In its absence at home, he's taken to pushing any toy out in front of him along the floor in a vacuum-esque stance ... a bat, a toy piano, one of my plastic mixing spoons.

Now, he can feel useful. AND train for his future as the world's greatest husband.

There's nothing quite like a man with a vacuum. Next up: a toy iron, cappuccino maker, and manicure/pedicure station to practice on his mommy. THEN I'll think we'll be even for the 50 plus pounds I gained to have him.

What's Wrong with this Picture? At Home, Vol. 1

Anyone else live like this?

Anyone up for a toy swap?

I feel confident that if even just the few loyal readers of this blog joined with me in a round-robin with our kids' toys, we could put Fischer-Price and Baby Einstein out of business. Not that this is my goal ... love you guys!!! ... and your plastic crap, so attractively priced at the $17 or less price point so that I don't think twice about buying it. And NO one named Grama or Aunt thinks twice about gifting it.

But if we stopped buying and started trading, I'm pretty sure there'd be no need to buy more books, toys or stuffed animals, especially for our number two's or three's.

I am thinking some type of library-card type check out system. We could meet at Starbuck's for a latte for the handoff. I'll take a Venti Skim Vanilla and that stack of Curious George books in exchange for this Sandra Boynton collection. Or this giant toddler-height Easter bunny for your Baby Einstein piano.

Because, and I think I speak for everyone at least in my household ... there is no need for 68 toys to be pulled out and picked out 129 times a day. And there's probably no need for one two-foot short stuff to have 68 toys anyway.

When all he really needs is one $2 wiffle ball bat and some space to roam.

These Can't Be Real Laws

Imagine my horror, when reviewing some of the day's pharma news for work, when I ran across this little gem. An article about the "controversy" of public breastfeeding as ... indecent exposure?

Now. Most people reading this know I didn't breastfeed. And you may or may have not breastfed, or even had a baby. And either way, certainly you, and me (in imaginary if-Aimee-did-breastfeed-world) may or may not care to do so in public.

But little would I have guessed that had we CHOSEN or NEEDED to feed our baby, say, on an airplane ride, we might be breaking the law depending on what state we're flying over.

Out of concern that not enough women are breast-feeding, a growing number of states are passing protective laws and policies. Today 38 states give women the explicit right to nurse in public, and 23 states exempt it from public-indecency laws.

How generous of 23 states to exempt breastfeeding mothers from Paris Hilton-esque stints in the clink! How supportive! How woman-centric! How 2007!

What kind of asinine trend is this that you practically can't buy a pregnancy test without reading a paragraph about the benefits of breastfeeding, but as a country, wee don't support it.

I don't want to say it's shoved down our throats, because that implies it's a bad thing. It IS a great thing. My personal opinion? New moms should probably try it or at least do some reading or attend a class and consider it. In any event, new moms who want to breastfeed should be supported in every way to make it workable for them.

And yet the stats don't support that.

Twelve states have laws addressing women's right to use a pump to express milk at work. And the governors of New Mexico and Oregon recently signed similar legislation, which gives moms (unpaid) lactation breaks and a clean and private area to pump (not just a bathroom stall).

WOW. New moms in TWELVE whole states returning to work after a scant six weeks home with their baby (can't even go there in this post) who have committed the extra time and energy to pump at work get rewarded with ... the privilege of being allowed to pump in a toilet without getting fired.

This may seem like an odd post. I didn't breastfeed so this didn't affect me. And I don't know anyone personally who's had what I presume is the horrible "I'm gonna go hang out in the pee pee place and prepare my baby's food" experience.

But I do have a good friend who had to nervously inquire whether she'd for sure have an office she could pump in. I do have a sister-in-law who had to figure out, while in an all-day business meeting, whether it's worse to discreetly excuse herself for 15 minutes and have the Men in the room actually suspect she had to pump (that she has BOOBS and a BABY that EATS) or explode all over the conference table.

I'm posting because I'm frustrated that it's not supported like it should be - systemically, fully, and as a respected part of raising healthy kids. And I'm posting because the offshoot that affects working moms - lactation rooms, and bosses and co-workers understanding about pumping breaks - shouldn't feel like a pipe dream you can only get if you work at left leaning, cutting edge companies like Google, or one of the top five on the Working Mother list.

I'm also posting because this whole situation seems so silly ... I just had to figure out what you all thought too ... ?

Oh My Stars

Some of you know my interest in celebrities and gossip. Even though it's embarassing, it's there and I embrace my love of US Magazine and celebrity heartbreak and scandal and "Celebs! They're just like us!" photo spreads. And my God, the celebrity pregnancies...

Imagine my thrill when my friend Tina in San Diego informed me she got to attend the MTV Movie Awards in LA Sunday night. She and her friends were "seat fillers" aka cute and hot and fun and charmed the pants of the MTV dude. (Tina, I am awaiting a picture to post ...)

Upon my request, she provided an excellent detailed run-down of her celebrity sightings and observations. It was too good not to share:

mandy moore’s butt is huge. it almost knocked me out of my seat.

fergie is really much prettier in person – she is really short. she said hi to me on her way out of the bathroom. Cameron is pretty and tall too and really lean and tan but her personality was annoying. I expected them to have smashed in looking faces but they were pretty. Jessica biel wasn’t all that, but Jessica alba was. josh Duhamel is HOT.

heidi and spencer from MTV (Laguna Beach or the Hills???) are little tiny people with tiny tiny narrow builds. They are really pale and annoying. they sat two people away. Laura Conrad from that show is very very pretty and tall and skinny. The real world cast was really snobby and annoying.

paris is tall and skinny and walked right by us. she was actually really pretty. paris went to jail right after the show.

it was really neat to see jack Nicholson and Johnny depp. Johnny is a hermit and stayed back stage the whole time.

Rob from Rob and Big (MTV) is really really short but gave off a fun, nice vibe. the rappers were totally thugged out. Aly and AJ (sisters who sing) looked like 80 pound hookers with perfect hair.

will Farrell is hairy and ugly and big. rihanna is beautiful.

Now, I do have a hard time believing Mandy Moore's butt is that huge.

At least I hope to dear GOD it's not. Because I can't imagine what label might be applied to the rears of the rest of us normal human beings if Mandy freaking Moore (whose work I have been admiring on the Entourage Season Two DVD) is that big.

(By the way, Entourage is probably my favorite show. Makes HBO more than worth having post-Sopranos.) (Sniff, sniff.)

I hope this up close and personal celebrity information thrills you as much as it does me. And if it doesn't, and if you even think maybe I'm acting like a starstruck 16 year old girl, well, like, whateVVVVERRRR.